Signs, Signs, Everywhere Signs

This post was created in response to a writing prompt by Mama Kat:  "If you were the type to believe in 'signs', descibe a 'sign' you have received from someone."   I'm not sure when I wrote it, but I'm pretty sure it was just prior to returning to my home town just prior to my high school reunion in November, 2011. After seeing these 'signs' to and from my journey tp Philadelphia, I just HAD to share it with all of you. Warning, a few tissues may be required during reading.

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Samantha never walked this Earth, hell she never had the chance!  But that gorgeous little girl really knows how to soar majestically with the regal falcons in our little town and every where that I travel from home.

Back in 2001, I gave birth to a tiny little girl who never really had a chance at life. Born at 25 weeks gestation, her under-developed lungs never took to the medicines the NICU doctors were pumping into her body.  Samantha lived just nine hours but she made an everlasting mark on my heart.

On any given day (especially when I am driving long distances), my magical little girl makes an appearance by way of her on special sign.  She's no longer a tiny infant in my dreams, but a young beauty, sporting glorous, spiraled, auburn pigtails, wearing pink overalls with a pristine white short-sleeved shirt, ruffled white bobby socks with pink trim and snow white sneakers.  Her laugh is pure and her smile endearing. She is a free spirit, a dare devil in her own way!

Early on after "losing" Samantha, she visited me in a dream arriving on the back of a red tail falcon.  Smiling and giggling, holding on to the scruff of its neck, her pigtails flowing in the wind. She hopped off upon landing and rain straight into my arms.  She whispered "I love you Mama. Now just smile for me. I'll always be around you.  My friends here will bring me to you when you need me most. I love you to heaven and back again.  When you see the falcons, I'm there smiling at you and telling you that I love you.  So no more tears Mama, no more tears."

Ever since that day, whenever I see a regal falcon or hawk with its immense wingspan open wide gliding gracefully through the skies, I smile and blow my baby girl a kiss and tell her "I love you more baby girl! I love you more!"

For Smanatha,
With ALL of my never ending love and admiration.
I love you to Heaven and back again, times Infinity!
Love ALWAYS,
Mama
xoxox

P.S.  Thanks for keeping me company on that long drive to and from Gandma & Grandpa's house last week!

Seven - It's OUR Lucky Number

"It's A Boy!"  Those were the words of  Harry A. Ludwig, D. O., the world's most knowledgeable, loving and caring obstetrician.  We just called him "Doc".

Doc was there with us when we got out positive test results with our first child, Samantha. And he was there with us after her death, sobbing tears of pain and sorrow, tears of hopes and dreams crushed.  That man had THE most consoling hugs EVER, the kind you get from your grandpa. The kind of hugs that said everything is going to be all right.  Warm, loving hugs full of hope and happiness.  

That was the reason that a year and a half after Samantha's death, we went back to our good friend wanting to try again for another child.  Doc knew the routine, Glucophage three times a day in conjunction with Clomid.  First month we tried, BINGO! We were expecting.  And Doc was the first person we called to share the news!

The first 26 weeks were the most harrowing.  Waiting, each passing day, with baited breath; we wanted, no, we NEEDED to get to 27 weeks this time to know all was well with our baby-to-be. Through it all, Doc was there promising us "poopy diapers at 3 AM".

It was decided that our new family member would arrive two and a half weeks before my due date of March 28th.  When March 12th arrived, we were filled with so much anxiety, but mostly with joy and happy anticipation.  Up until this point, we didn't know whether it would be a girl or a boy.  The mystery was going to be revealed and our world will change for ever, for the better!

Seven years ago, we heard the most wonderful and amazing words we've ever heard, "It's A Boy!" On Friday, March 12, 2004, at 8:36AM, Eastern Standard Time, our little Buddy came into this world, in the warm, waiting hands of Dr. Harry.  He got his first hug from that great man.

Seven years ago, we heard the saddest words ever "Call a priest, he might not live past today."

Seven years, he's had to over come one medical milestone after another....

In seven years, he has proven all the neo-natologists wrong!

In seven years, he's blown them all away!!

These have been the best seven years of my life and I would not trade them for all the riches or wonders in the world!

Seven years ago, Buddy was gently brought into this world by a wonderful man; a man that we will never forget even though we are separated by time and eternity!  Without him we would not be celebrating another milestone in our lives!  Thanks Doc for one of the best gifts ever. Thanks for our lucky seventh year.  We will love you forever for it!

Happy SEVENTH birthday Buddy! And thank you for being one of the best things to ever happen to me! I love you to Pluto and back again.... and I always will!

Final Farewell -- A blessing during tragic times

In April of 2007, I stumbled across an article in The Catholic Standard & Times regarding the founding of Final Farewell.  It was a pleasure to see that its founder was an old friend from my childhood, a fantastic and caring person with a heart of gold!

Having known Patricia (Trish) most of my life (we attended the same grade school and high school), it doesn't surprise me that she has worked diligently to establish a foundation that cares so much for grieving parents and their families.  Trish knows first hand how hard it is to overcome life's obstacles with hard work, dedication and love.  She and her group are truly dedicated to helping families in the darkest of all the hours in their lives, the death of a child.

I'm pleased that Final Farewell was born and that Trish and her team can help countless families get the help and support they need.  It is my prayer that they continue to grow and receive community (and financial) support for their most worthwhile cause.  To aid a parent and help with the arrangements for a  dignified and compassionate farewell to their child is one of the greatest gifts that anyone person can share.  Small gestures mean so much to a grieving parent.  

As I type this post, Final Farewell is seeking funds to give a family of four who perished in a Philadelphia house fire on January 13, 2011, a proper burial, including a memorial head stone.  Final Farewell's goal, via CrowdRise, is to provide this family with a gravestone marker so that they will be forever remembered.

I wish Final Farewell a huge success with this fundraiser and its  upcoming major fundraiser in April. This is a compassionate ministry that in these times of financial hardship is greatly needed and appreciated by the grieving families.

May God continue to bless Final Farewell and everyone involved in this MOST IMPORTANT mission to give comfort to the grieving.

If you would like to help  the family mentioned above, please click here. Any donation, no matter how small, is greatly appreciated. 


NOW FOR SOME OFFICIAL BUSINESS:
Please note that I  have received absolutely NO compensation  or favors of any sort in exchange for this post.  The opinions/comments in this post are expressly my own and I have no personal stake in the raising of funds for Final Farewell.

Back to Blogging Challenge - Day 3 - The Post I'm Proud Of

Well,  here we are again, day number three of the Back to Blogging Challenge. Today's assignment, which I chose to accept, is to re-post a blog that I am most proud.

Since I've only been blogging for a few short months, I don't have many posts to choose from for the first three topics of the challenge.  The following blog was written over the course of entire day and was edited over two additional days before I finally uploaded it to my blog. Three long and very tedious days which I basically ignored my two boys and just typed, deleted what I typed and typed some more.  It's the blog that took the longest to write out of fear of commitment... PUBLIC commitment to write a children's book!

 

I Wanna Write a Children's Book... I Must be Certifiable!

Several month's ago, Kelly DiPucchio came to my son's school to speak about what it's like to write children's books. Holy cow! I didn't know when I volunteered to help with getting the students shuttled in and out of the Media Center that, by the end of the morning, I'd have the writing bug. It didn't jump out at me right away. It sat, festering inside of me. Lingering, just waiting for the right moment to start screaming like a banshee "Let me out! Let me out! And let me start writing!"

About a month ago, it hit me like a tons of bricks. I want, no, I NEED, to write a book. So like any good and semi-intelligent person would do I googled "Writing Children's Books" and came back with so much information my head was spinning. Was I crazy? What was I thinking? I can't do this. My work isn't any good. I can't limit my book to 1,000 to 1,500 words. I'll never be a writer! Hogwash!

Later that evening while chatting with the hubby, I asked him what he thought if I told him I wanted to write a children's book. His reply was less than stellar. In fact, he looked at me like I was, in fact, certifiable! *Poof!* Went the dream. Or so I thought!

The next morning, I sat down and wrote 676 words of my story. I am so proud of my accomplishment so far. The book sits unfinished to date due to having a life outside of my computer. But I've already asked my cousin's daughter (who I've never met but have seen her amazing work) to be my illustrator. She is an uber-gifted artist! Now I have even more reason to finish the book since now the world knows I'm writing it!

Do I know if it will ever be published? No. Do I hope it will be? Yes indeed! It's my dream, my heart's passion. And I'm running with it! Let's hope I don't trip along the way and fall flat on my face!! 

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And now for the business part:  This post has been recreated and inspired by the SITS Girls BACK TO BLOGGING EVENT.  Interested in more information about this challenge?? Check them out at Back2Blogging.  Who knows  where  it just might lead you!


This blogging  challenge event is sponsored by Standards of Excellence, Westar Kitchen and Bath and Florida Builder Appliances.  Be sure to check them  out. Maybe with their help and that of the SITS Girls, Thelma & Louise can come live at your house! (Although I REALLY want them to come and live with me!)